It's no secret that Best Of The Web is our most popular regular series*. A recent survey has found that 93% of readers listed it as their sole reason for staying alive**. Our compiler, Tim Andrews, is flooded with admirers and women constantly throwing themselves at him just for publishing it***
But it's time to up the ante. It's time to get serious. And by serious, we mean seriously meta. Because being meta is the thing to do. As such, this week, we are not content with just providing you a Best of The Web. Rather, we are outdoing ourselves and providing ... wait for it ... a BEST OF BEST OF THE WEB. That's right, we're taking BOTW to a whole new level by providing you the best stories of the year. And that's some seriously meta s##t, dude (to use the technical jargon of the postmodern literary movement).
So even while Menzies House is taking a holiday from formal posts, Tim Andrews refuses to rest. He refuses to put down his vodka red bulls, and instead, continues to dedicate himself to you. Our readers. Why? Because that's the kind of man he is****.
And so, with no further ado,we present to you a review of 2010 as seen through the eyes of Tim Andrews - WE PRESENT THE VERY BEST OF THE BEST OF 2010:
Politics, Economics & The Law
Best Campaign Ad of 2008: Dale Peterson (obviously). Runner Up: Pamela Gorman. Honourable Mention: Demon Sheep.
Best Analysis of U.S. Mid-term Elections: Last Remaining Politician Must Rebuild Entire Government Following Bloodiest Midterm Election in Recent History.
Best Libertarian self-parody: Libertarian Cheat Sheet. Runner Up: 24 Types of Libertarian
Best Use of Government Resources: 7 year old has lemonade stand shut because she didn't have a temporary restaurant license.
Best Satirical Story: Candidate May Have Lied About His Heroic Death in Vietnam
Best Moments in Political Feminism: Czech female politicians create a "sexy calendar" Runner Up: A Romanian model started a new political party for beautiful people
Best Politico Twitter Scandal: UK Labor Candidate Tweets "You know I think I might be completely sober for the first time in 4 days" Runner Up: CA Gubernatorial Candidate Meg Whitman links to cross-dressing Asian pop dubbers.
Best Hot or Not: The US Congressional version!
Best Use of Race Card: The NAACP call greeting card about the universe, solar system and black holes "racist" Runner Up: Scottish Retailer HMV has removed banners reading "Anyone But England" for promoting racial hatred
Best Volunteer Ad: Help Teach Kids How The Government Works by Simply Taking All Their Sweets Off Them And Telling Them To F**k Off
Best Moment in Perverse Incentives: Chinese officials try to solve the problem of cigarette butts by offering residents money for each butt collected.
Best Legal Analysis: The Law of Dungeons and Dragons Runner Up: Is Batman a State actor when it comes to U.S. law?
Health News
Best anti smoking-nazi Freedom Fighter: Nick Hogan Runner Up: The Dutch. All of them. Honourable Mention:Spainish Bar Owners
Best news for caffeine addicts: Coffee is Good For Your Brain
Best news for smokers: you have nearly twice the chance of dying if you DON’T smoke. Runner Up: Further health benefits of smoking. Honourable Mention: How smokos are beneficial to companies,
Best Article Against Health Fetish: This one
Best news for alcoholics: Heavy drinkers outlive non-drinkers Runner Up: Drinkers earn more than teetotalers. First Honourable Mention: World's oldest twins say alcohol is the key. Second Honourable Mention: Top 5 Most Inspiring Thigns Ever Accomplished (while being drunk). Third Honourable Mention: Alcohol doesn't kill your brain cells after all. Forth Honorable Mention: The smarter a woman is, the more likely she is to drink.
Best Scientific News for Newlyweds: Science proves you must have lots of sex to ensure a happy marriage
Best Development in Mental Health Industry: Proposal to classify happiness as mental disorder
Best lies by smoking nazi's: This list
Arts, Sport & Entertainment
Best film parody: Generic Movie Based On Every Movie Ever Made
Best New Beverage: Bourbon Milkshakes!
Best New Vending Machine: Mojitos every 30 seconds
Best Nightclub Theme: Margaret Thatcher
Best Moment in Sport: This This College Gridiron trick play
Best Book Trivia: Size of Books Determined by Size of Sheep
Best Copyright Warning: "May he who steals this book suffer the pangs of death infernal!"
Best Chapter from Political Anthology: The Smokers' Code
Foreign Affairs
Best Spy: Anna Chapman. Who's now in Playboy.
Best Border Ceremony Now Tragically Cancelled: India-Pakistan
Media
Best Headline Of The Year: Skywalkers in Korea Cross Han Solo. Related: Sandwich board of the year.
Best Blogger Alive: Alex Balk
Best Now-Defunct Blog: Look at this f**king Hipster
Best News Channel: Fox News with the top 13 shows on cable news.
Other
Best Underwear: Metallic type lets you send a message to the TSA
Best Liar: Harvard University Student Created Entire Fake Life History to Gain Admission
Best P**sed off Employee: This guy who writes printer cartridge ads
Best Alternative History: Ron Paul in 2003 Runner Up: What is mass-murder Lenin died 5 years earlier?
Best Suicide Prevention Moment: Caller So Angry At Person Suicide-Prevention Priest Falling Asleep He Doesn't Kill Himself to Complain
Best Facebook Graph: Relationship Breakdowns by Date
Best Horny Woman: This one
And finally, the Best Use Of Aminals: Para-sailing donkeys
(Tim Andrews is the Managing Editor of Menzies House. His personal blog is Musings of an Australian Classical Liberal in Washington DC)
*Explanatory Note: BOTW is our only regular series
**Further Explanatory Note: Survey taken exclusively by voices in Tim Andrews's head
*** Tim wishes to stress that if a certain someone is reading this, the aforementioned comment is a joke, begs that she not hurt him.
**** A man with serious mental health issues. Seriously. He needs help. It's no laughing matter.







